Had a meeting with my manager and some guy from HR today. Le Homme was all convinced that this would be the end of it, and I’d be back at work on Monday. I was less convinced.
Unfortunately, I was right. The meeting conversation went along the lines of –
Manager – So we’ve investigated the stuff in the lab and it turns out you did do what you said you did.
Me – Yes. I’m sorry. I’m a muppet. It won’t happen again.
HR Guy – Something irrelevant
*pause while manager and I just look at HR guy*
Manager – So I don’t get why you did it. I mean, WHY?
Me – Don’t know. Irrational actions have no rational explanation.
Manager – OK. Well, we’re going to take this to a disciplinary hearing because I’m a spineless bastard who can’t make a decision, even though I get paid 80 grand a year to do so.
Me – Whoop.
The worst part? Phoning Le Homme and telling him. He was SO SURE that everything would be ok. And it still might be, I might get to keep my job, and the silver lining is I’m off with full pay until the disciplinary. And the secret, late night, last thought? I only want to keep my job because of the pay, pension and general benefits. Also, the red-hot shame of telling friends and family I’ve been fired. But if we could afford it? I’d call my boss now with my resignation.